The fear of being alone is
And holding on to fear, too tightly.
There are plenty of ways to move on. Some jump off ship and hang on to another rope on the cliff. Yes, most often than not, rebound relationship is another suicide.
1. Why not try to be alone for the meantime? Find those things you have set aside for sometime because you were busy with your relationship. You might consider drawing, I did. Even if I wasn't so good but it helped. Or try the magic of coloring books. Tracing the lines will put your focus in what you're doing. You will not think of that ex. For the meantime.
2. Are you a music lover? Listen to music. Sing along even you feel inferior of your favorite singers but who cares? Focus on the lyrics and sing your heart out.
3. Watch movie alone even if you feel dumb eating that large popcorn but it is liberating. Cry if you must or laugh, it's a form of catharsis. The pain will disappear and return perhaps, but, what if it won't?
4. Write. Don't mind the grammars or the subject verb agreement or if you are using correct syntax, just express what you want to say. Or write a story and get back to that someone through writing. Remember, words are better than sword. I killed people in my stories and it felt good albeit there was no inflicted pain, it was sarisfying just the same.
5. Write a thank you letter. Everything you are grateful and learned from that relationship, write them down. Make sure you meant what you said. It's not about healing the relationship with your ex but to mend the pain within you. It's not about him/her, it's about you.
6. Refrain from entertaining another possible relationship. In short, no to rebound kind of thingy. If you cannot heal yourself then you will be creating a cycle, a viscious one. And you will be circuited back to where you've been. Get a breather!
7. Stop stalking your ex or even sending random messages. It won't work. You will feel desperate and needy. Whatever you will discover will cause you some more pain. It will be unfair to yourself, stop sabotaging your own happiness. Pain will never make you happy. It will only drag you to misery and you will get ugly. Noone will ever make you feel good except that small voice telling you, you deserve better and s/he is an asshole! Period!
8. Always prioritize yourself. Love yourself first. Do not put someone on top of your list if your feelings are not reciprocated. Stop the heroism complex. It will lead you nowhere but to continue demeaning yourself. Focus on self-respect and self-preservation. If s/he loves you, there's no reason to demand for attention.
9. Go out. Reconnect with nature. Walk barefoot on the grass. Count your steps and feel the cells in your body singing with life.
10. Exercise. Run. Stretch. You need to release those negative energy. Shape up and you will realize you've beaten yourself for so long. That you have overlooked, that you deserve the best because you are the best version of yourself.
The best lesson to every break up is finding solace in solitude. Heartbreak is not that painful. Mind you, papercut is more prickly. What's fearsome is the fact that you will be threading the world solely. Again. And memories are everywhere but being alone will teach you to love yourself more. To listen to the music in pregnant silence.
And above all, you will enjoy your own company and you will get to know who you really are and what you are composed of.
Moving on is easy
Just learn to loosen that grip
Let go
If the tears come
Let it flow
And pat your back and whisper, this too shall pass.
So keep moving forward.
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