It is not an easy journey. I succumbed to a challenge and it seems I can not sustain yet I am still hanging and ultimately moving forward, inch by inch.
Probably, what holds me somewhere is the fact that I really wanted to make this first novel in full English a blast. I started with just a lengthy post in FB conceptualizing a not-so-traditional love story of two young hearts. Separated because of circumstance and after 5 years reunited. The guy for luck of better words to say it, somehow, denied his feelings to this girl who has been head over heels infatuated with him. The story was narrated through third person's perspective, for me, to be able to jump from head to head and not to limit my readers through one story teller yet I felt there were some kind of complications, or it's just me. I do not plot, I just write freely.
I always love story-telling, you could read about that from my previous posts. Due to evolution of needs, wants and desires, my writing skill was soon forgotten though at times I really wanted to brag about it but due to lack of exposures I had kept that little talent lurked somewhere.
Then, there was a challenge posted by Rochelle Melander, a 26-day novel writing challenge. My dormant writer self was awakened and aroused. I dared myself to write a novel. In English this time. English is not our primary language in our country and we do not converse straight English at home so this is a very big challenge, indeed.
I thought I was just going to write a non-traditional but still a boy-meets-girl-conflict-resolution-happily-ever-after novel but one afternoon as I'd explore the vastness of my imagination, I caught myself researching on multiple personality disorder. Then, I realized, it will be some conflicting schizophrenia type and so I trashed the idea and explored some more. As I typed, I came to one kingdom of butterflies and I researched on metamorphosis. I came with the idea of unconscious and subconscious and how they work. Also there's the existence of some religious elements, thanks to Dante's Inferno. Then as I read back, I had already reached 6 chapters with 25K word count.
I just don't know if I was still on the right track or not. I visited blogs of some published writers and I subscribed with Paul Dorset's. His blogs on tips for aspiring authors were really big help.
I intend to write this first novel up to 60K word count and yet it seems I have so many ideas I want to discuss though I am also aware that as neophyte as I am I need to offer a shorter first novel until such time that I already have created a name in publishing.
It's not easy.
I have complicated plots and I am really contemplating to finish the novel by June. Lorna Suzuki once said, "it's good to have a timeline" and yes! I will really finish what I have started.
There were days that I couldn't write anything and I felt so dumb though ideas were spilling from my active mind. Writer's block? I just couldn't understand that concept. Probably, it was due to some conflicting emotions that I have. There was a time my novel was stuck to Chapter 7 for 2 weeks. Not moving. Nah-duh! But published authors and aspiring writers in Twitterverse were very helpful enough to guide me get through with that gap. Thanks to James Jackson for the words of wisdom about finishing a book: "Write everyday. A thousand words are not bad and even 100 words are still considered a progress." Not verbatim but same thought.
Anyway, the bottom line is that, there are a lot who aspired, published and now successful. We may not came from the same skin but everyone of us was given a special talent. Mine is raw and yet to be cultivated. I once succumbed to one's challenge, I didn't meet the 26 day requirement but hey I still have extra 26 days this month and another in June. Yes?
I just need a pat on the back and good words to feed my soul because I will always have that feeling of hanging on a cliff.
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